Morning Coffee #6: Short-sightedness due to nationality

A friend once told me that you can never truly make long-term plans in Nigeria because the expected unexpected happens. I immediately understood what she meant. I expect traffic or power issues but not on days where I thought I made foolproof plans. In fact, I choose to blame my current eye defect on the fact that the bulbs in my childhood home weren’t bright enough, not thanks to my being a Nigerian citizen. Fucking country.

In order to be the best at what you do, try very hard not to be a Nigerian civil servant about it.

There’s history. And there’s truth. The victorious will always tell their version of the story. The losers, if still alive, will have to do a little more than protests to get their side of the story into history books.

I’ve seen a pastor making moves on his friend’s wife. I’ve also seen a notorious criminal help an elderly woman carry her heavy bag. In those moments, if I didn’t know any better, I would have said the latter was a saint and the former a Nigerian politician.

Nobody is infallible. If you think it could never be you, life has a twisted sense of humour that slow pushes on you the very thing you said will never come. Which is why sometimes, I say I could never be a billionaire.